While I am not the biggest Katy Perry fan, I do love the “Wide Awake” video, as she sings about stomping out her fears, and living freely. The little girl in this (aka Little Katy Perry) has a great scene (image above) of attacking her fears into oblivion. This video is a great reminder for us all.
As we get older and have more and more life experience behind us, we develop automatic mechanisms to deal with negative situations. While this may sound like it’s a good thing, it oftentimes is not. The older we get and the more rejection we face, the more we develop fear and expectations that things will automatically not work in our favor. This is where meditation is a huge help with reversing that.
No matter what stage of life we’re in, no matter what situation we’re dealing with, we have a choice in how to look at the “bad” times. The fear in us will say, “this is the worst thing that has ever happened to me, and I don’t know how I’m going to move on”. The positivity in us will say, “This is a win/win situation. Either I win because it will turn out well or, I win because I learned something new, and developed a skill in how to heal and improve in the future.” When you can tell yourself that fear is only an illusion and that relying on past pain is a bad thing, you have achieved a lot more than most people. Automatically, that makes you a stronger human being.
To “humanize” all this a bit more… Back in 2008, I worked for a very large global technology firm, running a small division. It was exhausting – I was constantly berated, bullied, and worked harder than anyone ever should. I was living on 3-4 hours of a sleep a night, and finally got to the point that I was not only exhausted, but emotionally beat up as well. I felt that nothing I did was right, and that I’d be completely useless to anyone else. As I was getting ready to quit a year later, one of our partners approached me about starting my own company and working in a consultative capacity. I was scared beyond belief to do something like that – to literally have no idea what months I’d be bringing in income, and which months I’d have nothing. But, anything was better than enduring even more time at that company, being completely miserable. So, I took the leap. Sure, there were a lot of months I felt as though nothing was going to go my way, and I’d be poor, living on the streets. But, there were also a lot of months where I was doing so well that it made the drier months a lot more manageable. I learned so many things along the way:
- How to deal with rejection – you find ways to work through it – be a hustler
- How to deal with demanding customers – learn when to say no and walk away
- How to cope on the down months – don’t overspend on the good months
- How to tighten up my legal contracts, and get everything in writing – that one bit me a few times, causing me to lose a few thousand in income
- How to expand my horizons and find new ways of doing business – learning to be creative and tapping into lesser-known skill sets
- How to appreciate all of those who work hard to make their dreams happen, as it definitely toughens you up!
The end result was me having that company for five years, before moving onto other endeavors, where I’ve been allowed to shine ever since. While there are days that I fear I’m not doing well enough (see past experience, instilling fear), there are plenty of days I a happy, confident, and pushing myself to do even great things.
To bring this full circle, a lot of this is achievable through meditation, and today’s practice allowed me to renew my confidence in myself and my abilities. Anyone can continually feel on top of the world, regardless of what situation they may be facing!