Today’s meditation was an amazing reminder to: Just. Let. Go.
Even though I’ve been meditating for a few years, I still have my moments where I hold some fear and uncertainty towards something, and it will consume me until it’s restored back to (my version of) normal. Then again, I’m a “doer”, and would prefer to work to fix something than let it go and do nothing. (Then again, it usually happens when I’m tired or hangry.)
But, it’s a true testament that all of us have our moments – moments that we’ve decided to bring to the situation, not the other way around.
Things are given meaning when WE give them meaning. Otherwise, they’re neutral events that will mean nothing to one person and everything to another. Oftentimes, when we put negative meaning behind something, we automatically shift the blame to that thing/someone versus taking the time to understand why WE feel the way we do. I know people (whom I’ve made a conscious decision not to befriend) that always shift the blame to another, being so “kind” (sarcasm) to berate another human for anything that is bothering them. (Talk about someone who needs meditation… or therapy… or both.) If you are one of those people that automatically flip to the negative, ask yourself the following questions:
- When it feels like nothing is going your way, what is your typical reaction?
- Are you immediately negative or do you ask yourself what the universe is trying to tell you right now?
- Do you feel that someone else is to blame for your feelings? If so, how do you respond to them?
- Do you feel afraid, anxious, and chaotic?
Being able to (truthfully) answer these questions for yourself is where the crucial messages come in, and we have to listen. No one likes that “anxious” feeling of not knowing. However, that uncertainty in life can be a very powerful and beautiful thing! The more you allow your conscience to kick in, the more time you spend getting to know and love yourself, and the more time you take to learn to love yourself; the more positive life experiences will be.
A Brief Personal Story
As some of you may know, I’ve not always been the best at relationships. A lot of this was due to an extreme bout of self-consciousness that carried me through most of my life, up until my early 30s. I never believed I was good enough for the people I “should” be dating. In fact, I didn’t believe I was good enough for anyone (friendships included), or even at anything I knew I could do. I felt ugly on the inside and the outside – I was an incredibly toxic human being!
Then there was a moment around my mid-30s where I realized I was doing life all wrong. I stopped seeking out someone to fill a void – someone that would define who I am; and remained single for two years! Sure, I went on dates but I had to take a step back, get to know me (which wasn’t pretty), and just “be”. Well, it paid off! About a year later is when I started meditating, and really connecting with who I am. Since then, about 95% of my decisions are based on my conscious ability to think through how I’m feeling in the short-term, as well as the long-term. I sometimes have to tell myself “you’ll thank me later”. If I can’t make a decision, or something has gone wrong, I take a step back, trying to understand what I’m supposed to learn from it; and either decide what to do next, or let it be for a while (usually that’s when my 5% of irrational decision making comes into play, but I’m getting better).
SO… take some time to get to know yourself – be honest with yourself and your feelings. Be proactive in WHO you actually want to BE because no matter what, it’s never too late!